Down with the Stigma – Abuse is Abuse

Societal norms tend to suggest that men are all powerful beings capable of ignoring both physical and psychological pain. The only problem with such convictions is that they are clearly debilitatingly false and dangerously life threatening. If you don’t believe me, then conduct the following very non-scientific experiment.

Just ask a man, any man, if he would deliberately jump into a twenty-foot deep, dark, inescapable, swampy pit filled with hundreds of starving fourteen-foot alligators. I am almost certain that after gifting you several colorful expletives in response to such a ridiculous question, he would go on to tell you that he:

1. isn’t stupid;
2. would be reduced to gator treats which would hurt a bit and
3. would forever associate puddles, bathtubs, swimming pools, rain, random watery pits and possibly any type of enclosure he perceives as inescapable with intense pain and extreme danger.

I think we can all agree that our experiment proves that men, when exposed to only hypothetical pain and emotional stress, are quite capable of articulating that the real life consequences of our trial would result in significant, real-life physical and psychological pain.

How, then, can society continuously stigmatize the physical and psychological pain men experience as they try to survive in the swampy pit of abuse? Let’s drop the stigma and give support whenever, wherever and to whoever it is needed. No matter who experiences it, abuse is abuse.

Domestic Violence Literature Focused On Men

This article was updated on 2/28/2025 to reflect an expanded Literature section.